I AM 31

It’s my birthday - November 18. And this post is my first thing morning…

I also checked my 30th birthday anniversary (http://blog2.mavadat.net/2008/11/happy-birthday-to-me.html) and realised how painful aging can be. I remember when I was a teenager I liked to age perhaps out of curiosity or to seek some independence. I also remember when I was 22~23 I liked birthdays as reminders of moving towards maturity.

But hang on!!! I have lost that brave generous feeling, and I cannot take aging this easy anymore… deep down, something huge has changed I suspect… the era between 28~30 was like a target achieved for a few years and now I’m losing it! An increasing distance is being put every year with no hope for a second visit. When I flash through my lived life back, I admit this “COULD” have been done better. Not arguing that I’m doing it the wrong way, but considering some lessons I’ve learned it’s no surprise things could be handled more efficiently and it could have been lived way more satisfactory. Though, in general, I think I was gifted a successful life [so far], eventually there’s no excuse with not investing on potentials. I understand 31 is generally accepted as being young and there’s heaps of upcoming days to be spent, used, and wasted; but, even at this biological age my body senses little wears and tears, and to me that’s a warning sign, and a call for some change to avoid freaking future blameworthy feeling.

I’ve always believed LIVING a LIFE has coincidentally all the characteristics of a project. You’ve got resources, budget, timeframe, prioritisation, risks, disasters, requirements, plans, milestones, product, etc… and I still do believe in this, surprisingly with few minor changes with major influences and that, my friends, is the fact that unlike a normal project, with your life there is no pre-defined level of final product quality… you are allowed and sometimes expected not to ever be satisfied by your achievements… in other words, living your very life needs endless effort to produce best results possible within your specific timeframe which is unknown till the last moment.

Anyways…

It’s my birthday, and “HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!” don’t know why Sarah hasn’t waked up yet, gotta check on her… chao…